RO DBT for Perfectionism and Overcontrol
Is there such a thing as too much self control? Usually we think of self control as a huge strength, and it is! It helps us to achieve good grades, get the promotion at work and optimize our ability to get things done. But for some people who are “over controlled” there can actually be too much of a good thing, and this self control can get in the way of the ability to relax, enjoy life, and build deep connections with others.
Fortunately, we now have a type of therapy for people who are looking to let loose, enhance their flexibility and increase their feelings of connectedness. RO DBT was developed by Dr. Thomas Lynch to help people specifically with these desires. This evidence based treatment is designed to target “over control” and the habitual ways of coping that may interfere in daily life.
People who may benefit from RO DBT often have the following qualities:
- Difficulty with identifying or expressing emotions: this may feel like you are socially performing rather than connecting, or having a hard time matching your facial expressions to what you are feeling
- Being perfectionistic and overly guarded: this may include a hyper focus on details and quickness to correct others mistakes
- Rigid or rule governed behavior: this can look like compulsive striving, a need for order and structure, or difficulty adapting to change and being flexible
- Distant or aloof relationships: this could include being slow to warm up or feeling like an outsider ,or different from other people
- High social comparisons: this may include lots of comparison-based self talk, experiencing heightened feelings of envy and grudge holding or feeling under-appreciated for the amount of effort you put into things
RO DBT helps individuals to better understand their over controlled responses, and to create goals in line with their personal values to better build a life worth sharing. It can help you learn to:
- let go of perfectionism
- better identify your emotions and effectively express them
- more easily connect with others and increase your levels of openness and intimacy
What’s the difference between RO DBT and traditional DBT?
Now, many of us may have heard or had experiences with DBT programs (including our DBT program at Ross Center), but RO DBT has several key features that can help you to determine which program is the right fit.
- Traditional DBT is for people who are undercontrolled, and RO DBT is for overcontrol. “Undercontrolled” people tend to let the feelings out and want to learn to better regulate their emotions, while “overcontrolled” people tend to keep it all in and want to learn to better express themselves
- DBT targets emotion regulation and impulse control, while RO DBT targets social signaling and low openness
- Mindfulness in DBT is informed by Zen Buddhism, while mindfulness in RO DBT is informed by Malamati Sufism
- In DBT, the therapist is more directive and uses reinforcement to encourage desired behaviors, while in RO DBT the therapist is less directive and encourages independence of thoughts and actions
- DBT focuses on radical acceptance (letting go of fighting reality) while RO DBT focuses on radical openness (seeking out what we want to avoid in order to enhance new learning).
Learn more about our RO DBT skills class to determine whether this might be the right fit for you, or contact us for more information.
